Okay, what I’ve done is I made a solid script, like the kind I used to write as continuity for my friend Bob Crane, the morning man at KNX radio, where I worked in the mailroom.
The photo above was snapped one of the many times I appeared — in a variety of roles — on “Tempo”, a television show on KHJ-TV in Los Angeles, hosted by another friend — Richard (Dickie) Dawson. Dawson sported a beard at that time.
If you follow the script below, you’ll do just fine. Of course, you need the mp3s in order to actually host such a show. I’m not sure how the details would work out, but it’s not my problem. My problem is creating shows and songs, not marketing same.
Oh — don’t read the headers aloud — they are there for your guidance so you don’t get lost in the presentation. In short, the title is silent. Just read what’s in quote marks and you’ll be all right.
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1) COUNTRY
Intro V1
“This is KGOD Radio — k-god, the station that makes it.
We’re going country now… dusty road, porch light, and a heart that won’t shut up.
Same lyric, first ride. Here’s ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Country Version One.”
Outro V1
“Mmm. Country don’t decorate — it just confesses.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Version One.
Stand by… Version Two’s coming in hotter.”
Intro V2
“Alright — same lyric, different saddle.
Still country, but this one’s got more stomp in the boots.
Here comes ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Country Version Two.”
Outro V2
“Yeahhh. That one had dust in its teeth.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Country Version Two.
KGOD keeps it moving…”
2) SIXTIES ROCK
Intro V1
“This is station KGOD — k-god, the station that makes it.
Now we jump into 1965… transistor radio, cheap guitar, and teenage voltage.
Here’s ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Sixties Rock, Version One.”
Outro V1
“Oh yeah… pure garage sparkle.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Version One.
Same lyric — Version Two next.”
Intro V2
“Same song, new band, same decade.
This one’s louder, wilder, and a little more ‘get in the van.’
‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Sixties Rock, Version Two.”
Outro V2
“Hah! That one kicks the door in.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Sixties Rock Version Two.
KGOD… no rules, just records.”
3) FESTIVAL BAND (BIG CROWD)
Intro V1
“This is KGOD Radio.
We’re at the outdoor festival now — sun overhead, hands in the air, and a thousand people yelling the hook back at the stage.
Here comes ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Festival Version One.”
Outro V1
“Woooo! That’s crowd medicine.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Festival Version One.
Don’t move — Version Two’s about to detonate.”
Intro V2
“Same lyric… but now it’s the closing set.
The lights are bigger, the drums are bigger, everything is bigger.
‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Festival Version Two.”
Outro V2
“Yeahhh! That one’s a victory lap.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Festival Version Two.
Next portal opening…”
4) NEW ORLEANS (SWAMP BAR)
Intro V1
“This is KGOD — k-god, the station that makes it.
We’re slipping into New Orleans now… humid night, crooked piano, and a grin you can’t trust.
Here’s ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — New Orleans Version One.”
Outro V1
“Oooo that’s greasy in the best way.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — New Orleans Version One.
Version Two coming up — and it gets stranger.”
Intro V2
“Same lyric, deeper voodoo.
This one’s got more smoke, more swing, and a little more midnight in it.
‘Not Scared Yet?’ — New Orleans Version Two.”
Outro V2
“Yeah… that one’s pure swamp gold.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — New Orleans Version Two.
KGOD stays slippery.”
5) BARBERSHOP QUARTET
Intro V1
“This is station KGOD.
Now we’re stepping into the barbershop — four voices, one chord, and that harmony that makes your spine light up.
Here’s ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Barbershop Version One.”
Outro V1
“Hah! That’s sonic geometry.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Barbershop Version One.
Same lyric, Version Two — tighter suit, sharper grin.”
Intro V2
“Alright — Version Two.
Same words… but now it’s extra crisp, extra cute, and extra dangerous.
‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Barbershop Version Two.”
Outro V2
“Yup. That’s the ringing chord.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Barbershop Version Two.
KGOD keeps the harmony alive…”
6) BLUES ROCK (ELECTRIC)
Intro V1
“This is KGOD Radio.
We’re going electric blues rock now — amp on ten, sweaty palms, and the truth shouted through a busted speaker.
Here comes ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Blues Rock Version One.”
Outro V1
“Oof. That’s a gut-punch groove.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Blues Rock Version One.
Same lyric coming back — Version Two is meaner.”
Intro V2
“Same lyric, different band.
This one’s dirtier, louder, and ready for a guitar solo that lasts all night.
‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Blues Rock Version Two.”
Outro V2
“Yeahhh! That one bites.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Blues Rock Version Two.
KGOD keeps the voltage up.”
7) GOSPEL
Intro V1
“This is KGOD — the station that makes it.
Now we go gospel — hands clapping, voices lifting, and sorrow turning into power.
Here’s ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Gospel Version One.”
Outro V1
“Mmmm… that’s a clean lift.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Gospel Version One.
Stay with me — Version Two is a full-on revival.”
Intro V2
“Same lyric… but now the choir’s in the building.
This one’s bigger, brighter, and absolutely unafraid.
‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Gospel Version Two.”
Outro V2
“Amen to that.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Gospel Version Two.
KGOD keeps the spirit in the signal.”
8) BOOGIE WOOGIE
Intro V1
“This is station KGOD.
Now it’s boogie woogie time — runaway piano, happy feet, and trouble thrown right out the window.
Here comes ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Boogie Woogie Version One.”
Outro V1
“Hah! That’s pure caffeine rhythm.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Boogie Woogie Version One.
Same lyric again — Version Two’s got extra sparkle.”
Intro V2
“Alright — Version Two.
Same words, but now the piano’s wearing roller skates.
‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Boogie Woogie Version Two.”
Outro V2
“Yeah! That one shakes the dust off your soul.
That was ‘Not Scared Yet?’ — Boogie Woogie Version Two.
KGOD still spinning…”
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Hey, here’s the Bardo bus! Hop right on and get ready for the bus ride of your life!
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See You At The Top!!!
gorby