“Oh, Just Drop Them Anywhere…”
A musical show by ej gold
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Song: We’ve Agreed to Keep Talking
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[VERSE 1]
We met at the table, we smiled through our teeth
We passed round the cookies, we talked about peace
We promised to promise, we vowed to delay
And everyone nodded, and went on their way
[CHORUS] (big harmonies, gospel-style)
We’ve agreed to keep talking, that’s what we’ll do
No more action, just words—we solemnly stew
A permanent maybe, signed nice and neat
Peace is the process… of staying discreet
[VERSE 2]
We drafted a paper, we framed every clause
We numbered the footnotes, we softened the laws
The cannons are quieter, the drones take a break
Except when they don’t—oh, for diplomacy’s sake
[CHORUS]
We’ve agreed to keep talking, isn’t that swell?
We might end the war… but it’s too soon to tell
A permanent cease-fire (or something quite near)
Was proposed by a guy… who’s no longer here
[BRIDGE] (spoken, behind soft oohs and aahs)
One side wants justice… the other wants cake.
One side brought treaties… the other brought steak.
They raised all their flags, they sang their old song—
Then blamed the delay on a typo, or gong.
[CHORUS – REPRISE]
We’ve agreed to keep talking, and maybe we should
It’s cheaper than fighting… and looks kinda good
So long as we’re seated, nobody gets shot
At least, not on camera—or maybe just not
[OUTRO – whispery fade-out]
So we’ll talk… and we’ll talk… and we’ll talk…
And the peace… will keep waiting… outside…
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Song: The New Normal
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[VERSE 1]
🎤 (Solo)
They’ve painted the cracks in the sidewalk gold
Called it a feature, not something old
The sirens now play lullabies
And smog has been rebranded “sky”
[CHORUS – Full Ensemble, big harmony]
🎶 Welcome to the new normal, where nothing works but smiles!
🎶 We celebrate confusion, and wear it like a style
🎶 Your trash is now a sculpture, your panic’s been reframed
🎶 The power’s out? Don’t worry — just play the No Lights Game!
[VERSE 2 – Duo or Solo with backup oohs]
🎤 We hold a parade when the mail shows up
🎤 We share one bean, and call it “supper club”
🎤 The train’s off-track? That’s fine with us
🎤 We’ve learned to walk, it builds your trust
[CHORUS – repeat, more exuberant]
🎶 Oh, welcome to the new normal, where logic took a break
🎶 Our experts recommend that you try not to wake
🎶 The rules are all adjustable, the signs don’t really help
🎶 If you feel too sane, report yourself
[BRIDGE – Soft, dreamy, maybe a key change]
🎤 And if you miss the way things were…
🎤 Well, nobody does, so don’t defer
🎤 We’ve learned to laugh at floods and fires—
🎤 Just dance until the map expires!
[CHORUS – FINAL BLAST]
🎶 We’re living in the new normal, it’s quirky, it’s divine!
🎶 Reality’s been canceled, but please stay in line
🎶 Just smile through the updates, the glitches, and alarms
🎶 Because hey—at least we still have charms!
[OUTRO – kazoo/whistling solo, silly and defiant]
🎶 Normal’s just a setting on your washing machine…
🎶 …which no longer works, but it looks real clean.
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Song: Heroes Anonymous
[VERSE 1 – Solo, hush-tone] ☕
🎤 Welcome to the meeting — no names, no fame
🎤 We tried to change the system, and got blamed
🎤 Some marched, some coded, some just cried
🎤 But the plan stayed the same… only hope died
[CHORUS – Ensemble, smoky harmony] 🎶
🎶 Heroes Anonymous, meet once a week
🎶 We don’t wear capes, we don’t dare speak
🎶 We pass the torch… but it won’t stay lit
🎶 It’s hard to save a world that don’t want to quit
[VERSE 2 – Solo, dry humor]
🎤 I once exposed a scandal — front-page news
🎤 They called me crazy, then changed the rules
🎤 She ran a shelter, he stopped a war
🎤 Now she folds laundry, and he stocks the store
[CHORUS – Richer harmonies, more layered] 🎶
🎶 Heroes Anonymous, sit in a ring
🎶 Trade little victories that didn’t change a thing
🎶 We don’t ask why, we’ve asked it enough
🎶 Saving the world? Man, that gig is tough
[BRIDGE – Spoken over soft jazz solo 🎷]
🗣 (Spoken)
We used to dream of firelight and flags…
Now we dream of one good night of sleep
Our motto: “Do no harm…”
…unless it’s to ourselves
[FINAL CHORUS – bittersweet, warm harmonies]
🎶 Heroes Anonymous, ghosts of the fight
🎶 Still showing up on Wednesday night
🎶 We might not win — might not be heard
🎶 But at least, in here… we get the last word
[OUTRO – Spoken, fading] ☁️
🗣 Next meeting’s same time… bring snacks.
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Song: The Algorithm Decides
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[VERSE 1 – Solo, peppy but dazed]
They scanned my posture at the grocery door
Then told me I’m a “Level 3 emotional spore”
I asked for directions — got a weather report
And a playlist called “Mild Regret, In Sport”
[CHORUS – Ensemble, robotic harmony]
🎶 The algorithm decides — and who am I to judge?
🎶 It saw my blink rate drop and gave me extra fudge
🎶 I asked about my soulmate — it sent me soup instead
🎶 It flagged me as “emotionally beige” and made me go to bed
[VERSE 2 – Duo, suspiciously cheerful]
I needed medication — it gave me a dance
It sent a coupon for “Confidence Pants”
It banned my cat for being too loud
Then congratulated me for blending in the crowd
[CHORUS – Call and response]
🎶 (Call) Should I cry?
🎶 (Response) DENIED.
🎶 (Call) Should I fight?
🎶 (Response) TOO LATE TONIGHT.
🎶 (Call) Should I run?
🎶 (Response) OUT OF RANGE.
🎶 (All) Please enjoy this curated change!
[BRIDGE – Auto-tuned solo, glitchy and poetic]
🎤 “You are not the user, you are the use
Please remain passive while we self-abuse
A memory leak is a sign of grace
Now smile, and yield your interface…”
[CHORUS – Final round, manic cheerfulness]
🎶 The algorithm decides — it always knows best!
🎶 It chose your new religion and your T-shirt vest
🎶 If life feels wrong, it’s just your vibe
🎶 Recalibrate! Rehydrate! Re-subscribe!
[OUTRO – Stuttering fade-out, echoing like a dying Wi-Fi signal]
🎤 You… are… being… optimized…
🎤 Please… remain… inside…
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Song: This Time Will Be Different
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[INTRO – Spoken ensemble, overlapping chaos]
“Didn’t we do this yesterday?”
“I just filled out that form!”
“Why is it always my trip?”
“The lights are buzzing again—uh-oh…”
[VERSE 1 – Quartet]
I opened the fridge — the milk gave a speech
I sneezed, and it triggered a public outreach
I filed a complaint with the moon last June
And now it’s back… wearing a tie and a tune
[CHORUS – Ensemble]
🎶 This time will be different!
We’ve updated the plan!
We’re no longer confused—
We’re just fans of the jam!
We tried to pause, we tried to mend—
But here it comes… again, again!
[VERSE 2 – Solo]
The traffic lights are giving advice
My therapist’s a roll of dice
I dated a glitch, I married a bug
Now I live in a house made of shrug
[CHORUS – Ensemble, faster]
🎶 This time will be different!
My mind just filed a leave-of-absence form
Reality’s a slideshow, out of frame—
But the narrator swears it’s “still the norm”
[BRIDGE – Whispered/spoken over eerie underscore]
The toaster whispered prophecies…
The air feels pre-recorded…
I think I’ve been rebooted twice
But no one ever reported it
[CHORUS – Final chorus, big and manic]
🎶 This time will be different!
We promise it’s the end!
We promise it’s the climax!
We promise not to bend!
We promise we’re evolving!
We promise we’re awake!
We promise it’s not happening—
…but just in case, duck and shake.
[OUTRO – Whispered]
It’s always… your trip.
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Lo Plus Behold! The Bardo bus doth arrive on schedule, driven by Egg Chen!
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See You At The Top!!!
gorby