If you’ve got a cell-phone, you’re a movie producer, and if you’re on youtube,
you’re a television network all your own. Everybody’s publishing themselves
online now, and it’s just a matter of how dumb it is, if you want the massive
millions of hits. Whether they stay on the video is another matter. All we can
measure is the interest, not the effect.
Here’s a young girl with a camera and a hand-held beat-box, and very little
else in the way of assets.
Here’s a fun vid that garnered only a quarter million views, but it’s too funny
to leave out:
now, of course, you’ll find lady gaga “bad romance” at the top of the heap
with around half a billion views, but she’s so heavily promoted that those
vids are out of bounds for our consideration. Let’s just look at what the
average person with a vid cam can do with no money and no connections…
Here’s something you could easily have done, and which garnered a
whalloping half a billion views without any publicity or promotion!!! It’s rather
grim & grisly, and shows how horrendously desperate human beings are for
diversion:
next most powerful in the view-cramming spamming field would be a
number of LMFAO and Avril Lavigne releases, but they’re commercial and
heavily promoted, so they don’t count for private viral vids…
Next on the private level would be Evolution of Dance, but it’s been lagging
down around 200 million views for a year or so…
Next on the list would be Best Ever, an introduction to what makes sex fun,
then David After Dentist, another miserable kid vid, then Kesha, Lady Gaga,
the usual run of heavily promoted sex music vids — a very large three-page
list, before private vids start showing up again…If i listed the names of the
commercial music videos, I wouldn’t be able to send this email or post it
anywhere that non-adults might wander. Absolutely every major music video
has a title that is far beyond suggestive. The nicer titles are things like…well,
I don’t want to even include those.
Here’s a lovely Shakira parody that has a well-deserved 57 million views:
And this anti-alchohol “drunk” video:
You’ll be bombarded by videos of people eating impossible stuff, kids getting
hurt, people falling down, lots of pain, and they’ll be at the very very top.
Once in a while, you’ll find something at the top that’s … well… not part of the
usual crap offerings with pain and misery and embarassment and public
humiliation as its driving force. Here’s one example out of thousands of crud
vids:
Just some teen girlfriends having fun around the apartment garnered 33
million views to date…If they were slightly older, and/or slightly less raunchy,
I doubt you’d see these large numbers. On the other hand, if they were built
like showgirls, the numbers would be a lot higher.
Here’s a porn vid disguised as a fashion vid:
http://youtu.be/I6N9xzf9inM
Are you frustrated trying to market to idiots? Would you like to know what’s
really going on in America??? Here’s what you’re up against, when you’re
trying to reason with the American public:
More about this another time…meanwhile, back to game development &
design.
gorby