OVAL OFFICE MOVING SALE!
It’s time for my OVAL OFFICE MOVING SALE! It’s a giant $20 Bargain Day, featuring incredible bargains, just to get some space in my Oval Office and studio here at the Western White House!
EVERYTHING MUST GO!!!
If you appreciate good beads and silver jewelry and coins and HAND-PAINTED pendants and all sorts of rings, bracelets, armbands and you-name-it, you’re going to get a kick out of today’s Really Big OVAL OFFICE CLEARANCE SALE.
BARGAINS GALORE INCLUDING “INTREPID” DESK!
You can order as many SALE items as you like. I’ll deliver whatever I have available, and ignore the rest of your order. There’s a limit to what I can deliver, but there’s no limit to what you can ask for. Accordingly, I’ll be giving the items a bit of a spin, explaining each one as we go along.
Most everything I’m selling today is something I had set aside for myself to use in a project, but I want to clear the space, and at the same time, ruthlessly unload some stuff on you, to force you into a situation where you have to use them and sell them or find a bigger storage unit.
When I say “ruthlessly unload”, what I mean is, these beads are worth plenty, and I paid very good money for them, and I’ve priced them so you can afford them — ordinarily, you can’t — they’re either too expensive now, or not available at any price.
Most of my African beads are just no longer available, period. They’ve been off the market for about 35 years, according to my friend and trading partner, Lisa Watagani, the most prestigious African bead dealer on the planet, and they’ll never show up again.
Most of the better beads ended up on a one-way road to a permanent public collection, in a library, university or museum.
Lisa Watagani was originally a German U.N. translator with a six-language portfolio, but there wasn’t much to do, so she often wandered down to the bead market, where she learned, over the years, how to estimate age of beads and points of origin, and of course, to price and sell them.
She kept her married name after the divorce, because her German name didn’t sound like an African bead dealer.
Her full-color ads in the bead journals were legendary, and she was the best of the best. It’s a tricky business and, like all other valuable collectibles, African and Ancient beads are often imitated, and you need to know about this, be able to recognize them, and be careful not to buy into the massive ocean of fakes.
If you’ve actually HANDLED thousands of old and ancient beads, you’ll eventually get a FEEL for them, and you’ll “just know” if something is ancient or not.
Until you have handled thousands of strands of old and ancient beads, you just won’t get it, and the FEEL will elude you.
Most of the African beads I have were excavated. That means they were buried for a long, long time, and the results of that are a variety of aging effects. The beads that have a LOT of effervescence are not typically wearable.
Most of the high-efflourescence beads look shiny and shimmering due to the presence of arsenides and other chemical intrusions. This does not make them any safer to handle, and I avoid using them for wearable jewelry, of course.
Mummy beads and mummy cloth come from burials, and were brought to me by “runners” who had bought them from “tombari”, tomb-robbers who specialized in emptying ancient graveyards. Life is a grim business, and we’re all dumpster-divers, and we’re all in this together.
There are many beads that didn’t come from a burial — they were found in a palace, or in a bead workshop such as that at Amarna, Egypt, which produced only royal inlays and beads. I have some 18th dynasty inlays, and they are stunning, rare, museum-grade and available, although they are not cheap, meaning you can pay several hundred dollars for each bead.
My FABULOUS $20 SALE beads are only $20, not a penny more, except for postage — at this price, I don’t and can’t pay the postage.
I specialize in WEARABLE ancient beads, and reconstruct my modern-metal necklaces, earrings, bracelets and tiaras in the ancient style, using the original ancient methods.
I do NOT use solder, nor do I cast. All my reconstructions are made with solid .925 sterling silver wire, pure copper wire, and solid 18k gold wire, usually .16 or .20 gauge round.
Sometimes I hammer the metal to make “spoons” or other dangling bits. This technique I learned from an Ashanti tribesman named “Kobi”, “Son of the Ocean”.
He told me that he was born on a Tuesday, if that explains anything.
His kids were tiny tots, and their jobs were to organize and clean the space — his shop was on a carpet, spread out on the marketplace ground.
Everyone had their own spot. Nobody argued, nobody fought over space, nobody made any trouble all day long, the whole time I was there. It was a respectful space, although the bargains were offered all around me — I was a stranger, a tourist, and therefore probably very rich, at least richer than anyone around the marketplace except the butcher.
If you’re willing to slaughter and dress the carcasses of a variety of small creatures, you can always make a living, and many butchers are considered very wealthy by any standards.
Of course, if you’re willing to overturn a fair and lawful election, you’re probably ready for the butcher block, too. Cash in while you can — the Reckoning is coming soon.
I’ll be showing the $20 SALE items this morning at the ICW on ZOOM. If you still don’t know how to get there, you have but to figure out how to ask. It involves email or messaging, and you’ll have to navigate it yourself. Damned if I know how.
I’m just days away from 79 years of aging, and it’s like being a special cheese or an opera singer. The older and rottener you get, the more they appreciate you.
I’ll be showing things like sterling silver rings, tons of great SLABBED and WEARABLE silver walking liberty half dollars, all sorts of constructed things, arty things and sacred stuff, too.
I think you can fill a Christmas stocking with what I’ll be showing today, and I’m happy to offer those things, just to bring a special lightness into your life.
Everything I ship out is THRICE-BLESSED. I hope you take advantage of this special sale to fill your GIFT LIST with goodies that will make the Holiday Season almost tolerable.
Notice I didn’t say “survivable” — that I don’t guarantee, as long as there are Republicans out there seeking to demolish us and crush us and keep us down, however, these items might actually save your life.
In one recent example, one of our folks bought an early Bible from me — I specialize in very old books printed before moveable type — and when he was out hunting grouse, his partner accidentally shot him, and do you know what??? It totally missed the Bible.
Survivors were able to auction it off at a very good price on eBay, and I recommend you do the same.
I have a very old edition of the Bible right here, but it’s a LOT more than $20. I also have about 2,000 rare books, which make up the bulk of my now-closed bookstore.
The retail value is somewhere around $300,000.00 in a normal book market, which these days doesn’t exist at all — now, you need to FIND the buyers. They’re not browsing anymore.
They’re not browsing youtube, either. You need plenty of social media reinforcement to get someone to look at a video, and unless you dangle constant promises at them, they won’t stay with you the whole time, either.
You have no voice and no way to market from a dead stop. It will take at least two years to build an audience for whatever you’re selling. There is no faster way.
Well, there is a faster way, involving bots, but eventually you get caught and dumped, so don’t even think about it.
Is there a solution to living in this world today? I don’t want to bum you out, but no, there isn’t.
Do the best you can to deal with it. Keep in mind that you’re not alone in wanting to scream “Just STOP IT!!!” at the damned politicians, all of them.
If it weren’t for the politicians, we’d be safe, happy and secure. With them in charge, you never know what dirty trick is coming next.
Be prepared for it by being your own boss. Make stuff and sell stuff and stay home, off the street, for at least the next year.
Don’t worry, things will work out okay from a planetary point of view, even if humankind is wiped out in a single day of holocaust.
Trump has his finger on the nuclear button, and is prepared to let them fly if he doesn’t stay in power, but don’t worry, there are a few grownups still remaining in the room.
As soon as the Oval Office has been cleared of all this RESELLER JUNK, the new administration can move in and get to work without all this junk jewelry piled up everywhere.
I suppose you’re wondering what the stuff looks like. I’ll be showing it on-camera at the ICW and you’ll have a chance to score some great stuff at ridiculous prices.
We gotta get this stuff outta the Oval Office, and I’m counting on your help to do it.
See You At The Top!!!
gorby