Learning to Teleport

Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Alien nude from my unpublished book, “Alien Portraits”

Often I’ll come up with an art series that has been inspired by Diablo 2, and the “Alien Portraits” portfolio is one of those ideas that never reached the public, but is sitting there, ready and waiting, for a publishing opportunity.

Sometimes it takes a while to get out there with a good idea. Meanwhile, I’ll be working on teleporting tonight.

It’s not that I forgot how to teleport or something — I’m trying to come up with a set of TRAINING DRILLS that will work here, and I think I have a few ideas that you’ll find very easy to implement, very effective to use and have a definite spillover effect in your daily life, which is all to the good.

See, the idea behind the TELE is the SWAY.

The idea is generally to use a series of gaming drills that help you find your “TELE-LEGS” — that’s professional “teleport talk” for achieving that gaming sway and swerve that makes you stand out as an excellent player.

But you want to develop your skills without pain and without injury, so you work within a situation where things are such that you don’t get swatted like a fly while trying to learn the aforementioned skills.

And what skills are they?

They are primarily skills of relaxing and moving without involvement in conflict, and that means skirting great mounds of howling enraged mobs of vicious unregistered and unlisted creatures ravenously biting at you from every direction.

Avoiding the Christmas Rush, you TELE in and TELE out.

Speaking of Christmas, we can use the BARDO SAFARI operations as a way of putting the “X” back in “Xmas”.

It’s all about the SWAY, and that comes with PRACTICE, and there isn’t any other way to get it — there is no mental substitute for PRACTICE.

Best way to get some practice in the TELE would be to find a gaming space that matches the general conditions of what it will be like in the area to which you think you might be teleporting, and duplicate that space, but do it in a quiet zone, no enemies about.

The very first thing you want to do is to TELE — teleport — where NOTHING can possibly happen to you, there are no enemies alive, and where there are no surprises. Continue reading →

The Art of Voluntary Identification

Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
My Level 47 Druid hasn’t died once, and has killed Baal twice.

If my TSCC Security Clearance hasn’t already long-expired, as I expect it has, since 1968 — the last time I used it — as a former member of the Intelligence Community, PFC Clerk-Typist Trainee 006″ with the AIS/ASA, following which I served with the “Arlington Witches Remote Viewers Group” under the title “Div44”, I hereby Self-Revoke any shred or vestige of my own Security Clearance, whatever it may be, and like I said, it’s probably already long gone, especially after my “sheep-dipping” in 1964 to allow me to operate as “Control” for Billy Byars and Billy Byars Jr., both close friends of President Johnson.

Please note that my MOS — Military Occupational Specialty — was only one digit away from James Bond’s “007” designation. My sanction was slightly more limited than was the notorious but completely invented novel-character, the British Secret Agent “James Bond” who was licensed to kill, I was also licensed, but only to seriously offend.

Hence, my standup career after the Army.

Hey, anyone with good taste and values will want to leave the Untied Snakes of Arnica real soon, especially if it turns into a military dictatorship, which is now very possible, so much so that even those in denial can see clearly what lies up ahead, if Congress fails to do its job, to limit the power of the President, so the President can never become a King — that was the whole point of the Constitution & Bill of Rights.

Trump is Power-Mad, and he’s in fact angling himself to be in position to fire people by taking away their security clearances, which means they can’t work at their jobs.

He’s also just on the verge of declaring a military emergency, so he can direct his troops to shoot down innocent civilians, because that’s what Strong Rulers do!

With a Power-Hungry would-be dictator in control of your life at the moment, It’s totally understandable that you’d want to escape, but what if your financial status says “no”? What can you do with little money and little hope?

If you’ve got medical issues, it’s even less likely that you’ll grab up a Bugout Pack and escape into the high country, and if you’re just barely stable and unable to withstand a change in environment, you’re just plain out of luck.

So maybe you CAN’T load up the car and drive off into the sunset, but never fear — you CAN escape into sanity by learning how to dive headfirst into a fabulous BETA-BRAIN WAVE BLOCKER called “Diablo 2”, and STAY THERE forever, or for at least a couple of hours.

Wow, can you imagine getting two SOLID hours of PAIN RELIEF from Trumpian howling, raging and torment, without ONCE thinking about TRUMP???

How you you spell “Relief”??? Not T-R-U-M-P, that’s for sure, and about R-E-S-P-E-C-T he knows nothing. Get outta town! Take yourself off the planet! Get away for the whole week, never mind the weekend!

Played in the ordinary way, DIABLO 2 is just a game, just a very ordinary videogame of the vintage variety, a definite legacy game that belongs properly in the 80s and 90s, but when activated with Objective Gameplay, it comes alive and becomes a transformational experience as well as an escape from the insanity that is Amerika today. Continue reading →

What Happens When You Die???

Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
“It’s a Mr. Grim, he’s come about the Reaping.”
  • Are you miserable tonight?
  • Does your head ache with fright?
  • Well, they call it “paranoia”.

That’s the start of a pop ballad called “Are you miserable tonight?”, a country song with a twist of blues.

I’m writing songs again, mostly now about paranoia and knocks at the door and fascists smashing down all the socio-political gains we’ve made over the past 50 years since the Civil Rights Movement got some wind in its sail.

Now it’s time for activists to once again take to the streets and to the voting booths, although they will be turned away from the polls if past Republican history is anything to go by, and it is.

So we’ll be watching this all on the news. Too bad none of this wonderful 21st century history manages to survive the Second Holocaust, and even if it did, nothing got past the Third Holocaust, nothing. Continue reading →

Beta Blocker Meditations

Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Meditation can be achieved in a variety of interesting ways.

Diablo 2 is not the only way to set up a Beta-Brain Block. Just in arm’s reach, you’ll find a variety of other “weapons” in the War Against Sleep, notably meditation, but there’s a catch — which meditation are we talking about?

Just like aliens, there’s not just one single breed, no single source of origin, panspermia — the idea that ALL life originated in one single spot and spread throughout the galaxy.

Sure, it could happen in some galaxies, but not all, but forget about galaxies for the moment — let’s talk about YOU.

Meditation has many faces, many forms, but let’s just take a glance at one of them for the moment — Relaxation Meditation, meditation that you do in order to rest and relax without going napping.

In general, we don’t associate snoring with meditation.

Continue reading →

Defending Yourself Against Trump

Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I am a very outspoken critic of Trump, yet he cannot silence me. I have taken steps to prevent it, and the more he tries to silence me, the louder my voice will become.

There’s no better way to publicize a book than to have it be a White House Hate Object.

This is a very different world from the one in which you were born, the ones in which you traveled through a variety of experiences, all leading to HERE and NOW.

In this very different world, a would-be world dictator is attempting to overthrow our government.

It’s still legal at the time of this writing to criticize Trump, but that won’t be the case if he gets his way in court and on the political battlefield — the Senate.

The HOUSE is just a bunch of poor Democratic idealists, and they don’t count for anything, unless impeachment is in the offing.

There used to be a time when both parties were united on one issue —  limit the power of the President.

That’s not what’s happening now. They’re defending Trump. He’s attacking US, and they’re defending HIM.

Republicans are not Republicans anymore. They’re stacking the deck with Jerrymandering so that YOUR vote doesn’t count, CAN’T count, because of the “RED” loaded district in which you voted.

Trump has sold us out to the Russians. Putin promised him that he could still stay in power after the takeover and dismissal of Congress forever.

This all happens, unless YOU motivate yourself to VOTE the bastards out of office, and then get busy helping EVERYONE defend the Constitution.

But while we’re waiting for the inevitable end of all dictators, how can you defend yourself and your family and home from Trump? Continue reading →

Block That Bitch!

Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Trump spent HOURS in front of the mirror, practicing this Hitlerian grimace.

Have you totally had it with organic world reality? Tired of the Hell World and Brute World invading your territory and keeping you awake nights waiting for the nuclear flash? Has it come to this, that your afternoon nap is the best part of the day?

When you find a hair in your fruitcake, you’ve found the best part of that fruitcake, and that goes double for Trump, Trump’s Minions and Trump’s World of Hate and Fear.

How would you like to escape from Planet Trump?

I have the answer, and it’s so easy to do.

All you need is a distraction that is compelling enough to draw your attention away from the news media screen for a few hours of relief, and I have just the distractions for you! Continue reading →

Handling The Between-Customers-State

Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Practicing guitar is always an option. Play softly.

If you’re operating a shop, storefront, booth, kiosk or busking station, you’ll want to know what to do with those interminable waiting periods between customers, and there will be plenty of them, believe it.

Many retailers and service personnel lose a LOT of precious productivity, and when you own your own business and want to be your own boss — well, you’ll have a LOT of time on your hands.

If you’re ever in a department store where customers are not actually engaged in sales, you’ll see the salespeople adjusting things, dusting things, re-arranging things, pricing things — basically, doing something, anything, to appear busy.

It’s widely believed, and perhaps it’s true, that if customers see salespeople loafing about, they won’t buy a thing, which certainly matches my extensive experience in retail.

Heck-darn, when you’re talking Retail, you’re talking Planet Earth. Why, back home, we NEVER pay retail — nobody pays retail anywhere except here on Planet Earth.

Humans of Planet Earth are so ignorant, they call it “bartering”, not “bargaining”, when you make offers and counter-offers.

Bartering is where you trade a laying hen for a carpenter’s work fixing your wagon, and I don’t mean that figuratively at all. Continue reading →

RED HOT Popcorn!

Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Image result for carnival king 8 oz. popcorn machine

Here’s the machine we got for the shop! It’s a Carnival King 8 oz. popcorn popper, which is plenty enough production for the crowd we get, even in a street fair, which is rare enough that we can rent if we need something bigger and faster, which we presently don’t.

The idea is not so much “to sell popcorn” — although that might be a very good business thriving business in itself, just plain old popcorn, but we have an angle that makes our popcorn very different from all other popcorns.

It’s the spice.

Anyone who knows anything about Arrakis knows that spice is always at the bottom of any deal.

Popcorn is exempt from some local and regional and all federal food-handler licensing. Ben Franklin’s arts & crafts store has a big commercial popcorn machine in the front of the shop — they give away bags of popcorn to incoming customers, being careful to avoid serving them to those inevitable folks who show up every day for a bag of popcorn and quickly run out the door when they’ve got it.

You can’t afford to give away stuff forever, and at some point, you’ll learn to charge for it so you can keep doing your public service, thus fulfilling your Bodhisattva Vow, the one you took in a previous lifetime.

It’s time to settle that debt. Popcorn is a good beginning, spicy popcorn doubly so.

We sell our Zombie Family Red Hot Popcorn Spice in a special spice bottle, and we offer the spice in sample form, by sprinkling a generous amount of our incredibly hot “salsa caliente” on the hot salted or unsalted popcorn as it’s bagged up, and offer a fair special to take home, two bottles for only $25, which is a LOT of popcorn spice that could outlast the planet.

So how to turn this into a street hustle? Continue reading →

Lucky Pennies Help Homeless

Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , ,

I asked myself what someone who has little money could actually accomplish to get the homeless back home again, and this is what I came up with — The Lucky Penny.

It has to be hand-searched, not bought in rolls, and it has to be unusually brilliant and unusually lucky to have been found, which covers a very slim territory, meaning that they aren’t all that easy to find, if you’re looking for speed-search.

The captured coins need to then be packaged, first in the small sleeve, then in the large packet, along with a backing card that contains the information about the coin, why it’s so lucky, etc.

Pennies From Heaven is a way of thinking. Let’s look at the situation of the homeless — first of all, there is no “the” homeless, every case is different, and money is not the only reason someone ends up on the street or in a tent city, and none of those reasons makes the victim at fault, but that’s where society places them.

So with little or no personal money, where do I even START???

Okay, first of all, you can’t FEED someone off the street. You can feed the body some food some of the time, but you’ll have to get money to do that, and while you’re getting the money for the food, who’s cooking it?

Then who delivers it, and to whom, and with what plates, knives, forks, spoons, cups?

It’s a LOT more complicated than one person can handle, but there IS a way to help and at the same time do some service and get some Merit.

Merit is the ticket that buys you out of this lower swamp level, and nothing else will do it. You need Merit, and that’s not just “good deeds” or “good intentions”.

Those and a couple of bucks MIGHT get you on a city bus, but it WON’T get you off The Wheel anytime soon.

There is no DIRECT ROUTE from homeless to employed and living at home. It’s a hard and complex road that must be taken step by step, but here’s the thing — if you merely feed the homeless, they may survive, but they still have no hope. Continue reading →

Zombie Family Picnic Fun

Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

 

Forget about the evacuation plans — there’s a good chance we can make a powerful jump, but we’ll have to use several magical methods to make it work.

You can set up a Zombie Family Booth and a Lucky Rodney Display anywhere.

You’ll need to set up at least minimally as a zombie family salesperson, but you won’t actually have to sell anything if you don’t want to, or just plain can’t, and there’s nobody else in your family who can or will do it for you.

One single small order of hot sauce is all you need to actually get started, but you’ll soon want to get the whole store and set it up on the side of the road or at a local fair, because this stuff sells, and what’s more, it may keep you off the government “roundup” rolls.

You need money, a lot of it, to get past this Trump Blockade in this Time Zone, and it can be done, but you’ll need lots of luck to make it through.

Speaking of luck, no matter what else you do, you need to buy, sell, trade and give away Lucky Rodneys, which has a powerful effect in itself.

Zombie Family Hot Sauces include BBQ sauces, steak sauces, marinades and more, and they’re all carefully made in a small family style kitchen, all fully licensed everywhere in the USA, so you can sell these products anywhere.

All our zomfam products carry Sacred Blessings, but nobody has to know that — they bring peace and harmony and good wishes for continued prosperity.

You get a selection of sauces in your first order, but most of those products will not sell — you’ll sell a TON of our “Habenero From Hell”, made with Red Savina Peppers, the hottest known EDIBLE hot sauce in the world!

You could set up a small outlet with just the hottest selling hot sauce, the Habenero, or you might want to include the most popular and not quite so hot “Chipotle Adobo”.

If you really want to go whole-hog, you can order all our sauces AND chocolates AND cappuccino mixes AND tea mixes and blends and all sorts of zomfam products that are ready to go out there on YOUR countertop to earn you money & Merit!

I’ve got the whole deal ready for YOU to sell up a storm, including the booth, which is nothing more than a canopy & table & chair.

You can get the USA flag canopy from K-Mart for under $40, the USA flag chair for less than $30, and the folding table for less than $50 while it’s still on sale — they’re already gearing up for back-to-school, so all the picnic stuff is on sale, up to 90% off, pretty much everywhere.

It’s going to be a tough year for any business that can’t go onto the street to earn a buck. Continue reading →