If ever there was a higher-dimensional cure for Quantum Boredom, “Witch Hunt” is certainly it, with its remedies of Endless Tedium and Mindless Meltdowns. There’s really nothing to do except blast through this advanced 3D game layout until the end, or you can go through it again and again, kind of like taking rebirth, eh? It’s only $6.95 in “No Contact” download format. Contained in a stylish brushed metal gold-colored Fancy Engraved Official IDHHB Flash Drive Pendant, it’s only $89.95, but wait! If you purchase four or more pendants, you get the wholesale price of only $45 each, and we pay postage!
This game travels with you anywhere, and you can put other games on it as well, so you can download nine games and only buy one pendant to get all ten games — but what are you getting for your hard-earned money?
First of all, you’re getting about three years of my work just on these games, and another 25 years in development of the Godd™ Gaming Engine & Editor, created by Dick, and the bank of models and sounds that are the creation of Uncle Claude, and the proofing and editing and particle beam technology of Barbara –a grand total of 100 years of video gaming experience, and that’s just in one lifetime!
It adds up.
Several Congresspeople got on the news channels last night after the appointment of the Special Counsel, and said that if Trump were able to keep his mouth shut, he’d be better off. No sooner had they said that, when Trump characteristically and obsessively-compulsively tweeted that “This is the Greatest Witch-Hunt in History!”
Trump is petulant, quick to anger, vengeful, suspicious and given to psychotic interludes in which everyone is plotting against him, except for Mike Pence, who is waiting in the wings for his chance, so I guess that counts as a plot, too.
No matter — Trump the Schlump gave me a hell of an idea for a name for my newest latest videogame, so I’m entitling it “Greatest Witch Hunt Ever!!!” and it’s available for download RIGHT NOW.
This is a NON-VIOLENT game, a game of chance and skill and in some areas a bit of superlative mouse-handling, plus a system of puzzles — you must correctly guess the nature and location of the HIDDEN WITCH, but can only deduce this from hints given by a series of HIDDEN MASTERS & GUIDES.
You are expected to UNMASK a series of hidden keys, mysteries, occult lessons and teaching entities are featured, all for the low, low price of only $6.95.
In this setting, you can sit down in the Oval Office and send powerful in-your-face green farts — actually ten different farts, burps and coughs, toward the “Resolute” desk, behind which sits an alien — which he is, albeit undocumented.
You won’t do anything in the real world, but you’ll feel a whole lot better, a lot more in control and a lot less overwhelmed by the biggest bully in the world, Donald “Baby” Trump — that’s what we used to call him in the Southeast Wrestling Conference after he hit a fellow cadet in the face while college-style wrestling, where that’s not allowed.
In the Oval Office, you’ll note a number of changes that I’ve taken the liberty to make now, instead of waiting until the Oval Office is no longer occupied by an ignorant clown.
This game is also only $6.95 in download, and has an interesting effect if carried as a charm or pendant.
“Пути Путина” is a very rough and in my opinion funny translation of “”Russia-Gate”, a tribute to the Water-Gate days of the Nixon Era, which looks to be repeating itself for our amusement.
There have been several “gate” scandals since that time. I was tempted to use “Ворота”, but went this way instead, perhaps inadvisedly, but I think it will fly all right.
You find yourself visiting Nikolskaya Street in the historical section of Moscow, Russia. The shops are filled with informers, who will tell you what has just transpired in each space, or give you directions for further action.
If you’re thinking you’d like to stop in at the Russian equivalent of “Starbucks”, you have a good chance of finding it on this very model of the ultimate tourist trap, yielding millions and possibly billions of Amerikan Dollars for Putin and his oligarchs, obviously a new band name.
This was written long before the Corona Virus, but I think you’ll appreciate the effect of an empty and otherwise very popular tourist attraction like this famous street in Moscow, because that’s what the street looks like now, a ghost town, like Times Square and the Grand Ol’ Opry.
This is a simple little setting — it would be terrific to take some FRAPS videos in here and use them as a very magical backdrop for your ZOOM meetings.
The street scene is also good for a ZOOM backdrop — just sit or stand in front of the avatar. You can take a snapper of this and use the still shot — it’s not animated, so that will save you a lot of trouble. Animated backdrops are coming soon, very soon, perhaps within days or even hours.
I’ll get to it when I can. Meanwhile, let’s see what other games are available from my Blue Line workshop.
It’s a tough game to set up, and most folks will be daunted by it, but it can be an interesting “capture the flag” style game, if you can manage the internet connections, what with strange servers and routers and drivers and all.
A beautiful game, with strictly magical firewands — NO PERCUSSIVE WEAPONS WHATEVER — dragons and unicorns battle it out for each other’s flags in a late medieval Tudor setting with a bubbling brook and wooden bridge.
This is a CTF (Capture The Flag) type game. That means that players join up through the internet to battle it out in teams — Dragons versus the Unicorns.
This game is in beta. That means we are very actively soliciting feedback from current players to refine the game design and game play.
We use the payloadz.com download service. That means you can buy and download instantly. If you have any questions after your order you may either contact us using the email address from your confirmation. Or use our contact form.
Death has never been so much fun! BardoTown DeathRun PC Video game by Gorebagg the Lost and the GODD Development Team. Years in the making, it is based on E.J. Gold’s best selling guidebook for death and dying, The American Book of the Dead.
Are there really zombies running around in the Afterlife? Well, are there any zombies in your neighborhood right now? What do you think people will become if they get hungry enough?
If you can recall your past lives, you’ll note at least several in which you were caught at the end of your life by a rolling, swirling mob of hysterical idiots looking for food and loot.
Another 3D CTF style game, and again it might give you trouble with the internet connections, in which case get in touch and we’ll talk you through it.
Is it worth the trouble? Yes. Is it worth $6.95 for the download? Yes. And never ask the auto salesman if the car he’s selling you is any good.
I’m not sure that even a clever computer-savvy person could use this game, but I’m willing to take the chance, so I delivered it for download and here it is.
Talk about retro games, this is certainly the King of Retro PC Games — I produced Dragon as my very first offering in 3D graphics on the Amiga Platform, which no longer exists.
There’s an overworld with castles and an underworld with dragons — how can you go rong? Hours and hours of mindless slaughter will bring a smile to any face.
Well, maybe not just ANY face, but a lot of faces.
There are several definite varieties of dragon, and some of them are stupid, while others are despicable and super-smart.
I know you’re gonna love it, and when you play Corona Killer, you’ll see the evolution of the layout at a whole new level of threat and challenge.
This is the original form of my latest video game offering, “Corona Killer”. I decided to use it as a basis for the new game because it’s such a good game, great timing and feel and sway.
You will really like the weapons in this game. They all make fart or burping sounds, one of which might very well make you barf out loud, made by my friend Curtis Armstrong.
“The only weapons remaining to humans after the Grogg invaded the planet is the ability to kill with a fart from the Bean Powered Weapons at your disposal by pressing buttons 0-9 on your keyboard. When you have found all the parts to the FartBomb, which will destroy all aliens, Take the assembled FartBomb to the Night Bomb Deposit located in the middle of the Main Street somewhere near the center of town… You can’t miss it if you try — it’s the giant valve in the road.”
Using New Particle Physics Engine
FartBomb has been revamped top to bottom, or bottom to top. In any case the weapons have been updated. The lighting model is outstanding and the farts seem to never stop.
“Ghost Hunter”
Just a fun romp through a Haunted Hotel with a GhostBlaster, fun for lunchtime or that special break! GoreBagg’s spooky scary levels will thrill and chill you!!! First & third person action shooter is fast & furious, simple levels with no need to map or memorize!
Review by Mick Perry
“GHOSTHUNTER is an action-packed, first-or-third person shooter. The player progresses from unranked noob to novice to neophyte to skilled to adept to master as she or he moves through the game. Points are awarded for killing monsters, bosses, opening chests, etc. They are taken away when the monsters hit you, when you buy ammo or take another minute of time.”
“Beginning players may well end with a negative score. You have to be fast, accurate, dexterous and sparing with your ammo to achieve a high score. After some practice you should be able to get through the game in 15-25 minutes or so. The game has no save function, a feature shared by all of the Godd Games so far. You have to start from the beginning each time and play through completely in order to finish a game. At first the game seems repetitive. Upon further examination, however, more subtleties are revealed. Though the layout remains the same for each level, save the last, the monsters appear in different combinations in the chambers and corridors. Thus, higher levels become more difficult as more monsters are added along with the timing of their appearances. Sometimes you think you’ve cleared an area only to find yourself being attacked by more monsters that appear from unexpected quarters.”
“The game is well-paced and engrossing. It achieves the author’s stated aim of raising attention and presence on the part of the player and will stand repeated playing. I recommend it highly to all voyagers everywhere.”
“Tesla”
From the madcap brain of the Legendary GoreBagg comes TESLA — From the madcap brain of the Legendary GoreBagg comes TESLA — designed with your mind in mind…The quest is complex and difficult. You have been selected to recover the stolen parts of the Spooky Tesla Spirit Radio, scattered throughout the Palace of Cthulug the Thoroughly Despicable.
The various parts of the Spooky Tesla Spirit Radio must be gathered and brought to the Secret Chambers of Cthulug, so that the world-famous Canadian Scientist and Hoover Repairman MrFixitRick, together with his friends and lab companions GoreBagg — noted mad scientist from the 37th century — and Kru-Ruk, famous Quantum Mechanic and inventor of the Quantum Monkey Wrench, can activate the Spooky Tesla Spirit Radio, enabling it to receive the vital message coming from Electrical Scientist and All-Around Fun Guy Nicola Tesla, who now resides in Parallel Universe L315a, thus saving our Home Universe from Total Annihilation by Cthulug and his evil minions, thus destroying forever the Thoroughly Rotten League of Very Evil Beings…unless there happens to be a sequel ….
Why We Prefer Retro
by Claude “Kru” Needham
The GODD Gaming Engine has on occasion been accused of being retro. Actually the engine is capable of any look and feel. Let me repeat that: the GODD gaming engine is capable of creating games with any look and feel.
- In the hands of a Disney animator the GODD engine would turn out games looking like cartoons.
- In the hands of Salvador Dali the GODD engine would turn out games with melting landscapes and clocks dripping over tree branches.
- In the hands of Picasso the GODD engine would turn out cubist nightmares.
On a lark we have created levels that duplicate the look and feel of WoW (World of Warcraft). We made a level very similar to TF2. We even created a game level very much like Call of Duty. By the way, because of respect for copyright laws we’ve dumped the look-alike levels. We only did them on a lark for our own research. WoW doesn’t have to worry about us horning in on their market. (rofl) It just occurs to me that Us gracefully staying out of Blizzard’s market is like a squirrel being polite to a herd of buffalo. We know who’s the 900 pound gorilla — and it ain’t us.
Our gaming engine is not why our games look the way they do. Our games look the way they do because we choose to design them like that.
So the question would be: Since you have a choice, why on earth do you design your games to look the way they do?
Now that’s a good question. Why on earth do we design our games to look the way they do? Answer. There is no reason on earth. Our games take their inspiration from bardo spaces, alien landscapes and parallel worlds. Simply put, our games are not from around here.
This approach is great if one is interested in helping lost interplanetary voyagers rehabilitate their inter-dimensional navigation.
So, we don’t actually prefer a retro look to our games. The look to our games comes from an other-dimensional inspiration. It just so happens that many of the retro games also capture this same look.
Just a little added comment here:
Don’t think of these as games, but as potential animated and still backdrops to provide YOU with some interesting settings for your ZOOM gatherings.
You can share the screen and take others on an adventure with you, and you can explain as you go, plus get feedback from the participants.
This is a powerful work tool for any high-tech shaman, and can be used as a storytelling device as well — ask me about this if you get a chance and you’re interested in trying something new in the way of storytelling.
This is perfectly adapted to the Corona World, it’s all virtual both online and off.
See You At The Top!!!
gorby