Win Powerball $1.6 Billion

If you think it’s easy to win millions or billions of dollars at any sort of game of chance, especially the state lottery, you’re right. It’s easy to win, but much easier to lose. Here’s a 2009 video showing the lottery win, plus an alternative life-style to the millionaire:

Did we win at the lottery? Not I — it’s not my sort of thing. But my Mom did, and lived for another 20 years without doing anything but watching daytime TV and playing an occasional table game.

I took none of the winnings, and it turns out, some 35 years later, we live a beautiful life that can’t be bought with money, a Work Life, and I wouldn’t trade it for all the money in the world.

Especially all the money in the world. What would I want with that? If you’ve never had a LOT of money, you’ll think I’m making this up, but I’ve known hundreds of millionaires and a few billionaires, and hundreds of very successful movie stars, and they were all miserable. Continue reading

ESCAPE! Videos #9

 

While you’re waiting for some asshole to attack you with a hammer in the middle of the night, you might as well play a video game or a couple of fun videos, so here’s your “Middle of the Night Awaiting Hammer Blows to the Head” video collection for the day.

I hope that the immanent destruction of your planet won’t inconvenience you terribly, but we must have bypasses, and this solar system is definitely in the way of progress. Don’t worry, you won’t feel a thing. Exactly which thing it is that you won’t be feeling remains to be determined by chance.

Look at it this way — if the Republicans lose, they deny it, and march against the Dems. If the Republicans win, the Dems will curl up and die, because that’s what they always do. Dems are too damned civilized, and they don’t realize there’s a war going on in their own backyard.

So while you’re waiting for The End — which is, indeed, nigh — let’s have some fun and at the same time, let’s learn something. Continue reading

President Binden Wins!

 

Yes, I know it’s “Biden”, but that ain’t funny, nohow, so it’s “Binden” for the laughs.

Christmas is finally here — we’ve had Black Friday and Cyber Monday is upon us, so start spending!

While you guys have been watching the news, I bin making jewelry nonstop for the past several days, and last night, I delved into the one remaining roll of 18k wire that I have left in my metals larder.

An example of my “With Love from Jack the Ripper” Christmas cards for 2020.

There was just enough wire to make exactly 13 small Modernist style earrings — actually there were 26 earrings in all, making 13 pair, to be precise, and precision is what we’re after, here.

I’m offering these solid gold earrings at $62.50 a pair — that’s nowhere near retail, it’s your heavily marked-down price!

Limitation is, I have just the 13 pair. Continue reading

Who is Jack Aiello?

 

I think you’re in for a few minutes of solid laughs here — I can’t imagine anyone getting through it without at least one break in the squalor of daily life.

The kid is amazing — he has a lot of talent, and clearly can break out of just the one gag.

That’s it for now — just wanted to share these unique comedy moments with you.

See You At The Top!!!

gorby

Democratic Punch-Out

Apparently, Donald Trump caught a wicked cold when he was out golfing last weekend. His doctor ordered him to drink a glass of scalding hot lemon water after an equally scalding hot bath. I asked Donald how it had worked out. “Can’t tell yet,” he said in his saddest whine, “I haven’t finished drinking the hot bath yet.”

Yep, you guessed it, if you know your Democrats. Suicidal Stupidity. They’re at it, as usual — haw, haw!!! To the delight of any Republican, the Democrats are busy punching each other and furnishing Donald Trump with belly laughs and TONS of soundbytes and talking points, and in his case, the resulting crash of the Democratic Party causes a major trembling in the earth. Continue reading

LeslieAnn Roasts Mark Meadows

So how in the world do you pull off something like this? Just hours after the news broke and the Mark Meadows scandal, which I’ll explain momentarily, hit the shit.

First of all, you’ve got to have a concept. In this case, it’s a simple matter — Cummings had Meadows’ back instantly at great personal risk. He stood up for Meadows when he was called a racist, which by the way, he emphatically is, and I can prove it. Continue reading

Questions From Kelli

Kelli has a class project due today — we all thought we had another week to work on it, but it snuck up on us real quick-like, and here we are:

“Why did you start performing as LeslieAnn?

Somebody had to do it. Seriously, it just seemed to me to be the safe time to cross-dress, but that isn’t true under the Rule of Trump, just under the Rule of Law, which we no longer have. Notably, I have not performed as LeslieAnn nor have I costumed up for photo ops since Trump stole the Presidency with a trick of the Electoral College, while losing the popular vote. Gender, Race, Religion and Intelligence are all presently under attack, and I wouldn’t appear in public as anything but white Christian if I could help it. It’s tough enough to face the prejudice as a Jew — add to that the homophobia and racism and you get “No Comedy Tonight” — signs that hung outside theaters under Hitler’s regime. Like Hitler, Trump has zero sense of humor. My aim in comedy is not to perform it, but to teach it. I had good teachers, like Frank Gorshin and Jonathan Winters, and comedy is a great path to wisdom. For some oppressed people, it’s the only way they can get in a lick or two while being beaten to a pulp by a large bully or an overwhelming mob of crazed zombies. For some great examples of this, check out Mel Brooks’ takes on Hitler, Jeff Dunham’s political rips, and Carol Burnett’s entire show all the time. Like I said, many comedians want to be saying something clever while they’re being driven into the ground by a bully.

“What is the meaning of LeslieAnn?”

Nothing in particular.  I like the name because it’s unusual enough that it can be used as a single name, which is how I always bill an act — easy to remember. Don’t overestimate the intelligence of humans of Planet Earth. LeslieAnn is the name I used for several female lifetimes and one male lifetime on Planet Earth — remember, please, that for me, a human being is merely an avatar in a fairly small and simple 37th century Full-Immersion Reality Game called “Urthgame”, and if you don’t believe me, you can look it up in the Akashic Records, which is presently called “google”. Continue reading

Take America Back!

Goddess Power — Take America Back!!! Use your spellcrafting, not your pitchfork!
Just in case you think there’s a chance that the United States will pull out of this slump, that people will rise up and take back their country, get used to disappointment. There is no courage in Washington, which is what made it into such a dump that an idiot could get elected to “fix” it, which can’t happen as long as assholes are in charge, and they are.
Don’t sucker into the marches. Don’t take up pitchfork & torch. No need to take to the streets — those who are hip to spell-casting know a better way, a quieter way, an invisible and subtle way.

Trump is thoroughly committed to the course of nuclear war. He lives on the Dark Side all the time. Even though he’s the President and has access to any information he wants, he still believes that the astronauts live in the NBC studios in Burbank, that the moon is hollow, and the Earth is flat.

He is in fact a “Flat-Earther”, which rhymes with “Birther”.

Nuclear weapons are so tempting. Those nukes are toys that Trump — who lives at the mental and emotional age of about three —  just can’t resist playing with, and NOKO is an easy target — just some tiny country near China, no problem, nuke them out of existence, and they won’t bother anybody again.

Of course this only makes sense to an under-achieving loser like Trump. Continue reading